Animals We've Become/Sitting Ducks

Sitting Ducks is the seventh episode in Animals We've Become.

Issue
"Alright, you sloppy joes!" Sonnie's raspy voice rang out first thing in the morning.

The sound of Sonnie’s voice pierced through my ear. I sat up in my sleeping back and rubbed my eyes. I hate mornings. I hated them when waking up for school and still hate them now that the world has gone to shit. I seriously don’t understand the school part, research shows that kids learn better after 10 am. Seriously 6 am? Too early, no wonder I failed my math exam.

I can hear Sonnie approach AJ’s sleeping bag. “Time to wake up.”

AJ rustled in his bag, “I-I-In a little bit m-m-m-mom.” AJ stuttered. He only just realized what he said. I could literally feel the embarrassment radiating from his gentle cheeks.

“It’s okay AJ.” Sonnie said with a kind smile. “It took me a while to get over my mother’s death too.”

“H-h-h-how did she go?” AJ claimered.

“Cancer.” Sonnie said.

"Hey, Sonnie. It's way too fucking early." I complained. "I want to sleep!"

Sonnie glared at me. “Shut the fuck up, Glenn. Jesus Christ.”

"H-H-Holy c-c-c-crap!" AJ stuttered

"It's time for us to move our asses." Donnie Cruz said, as he popped up the collar of his leather jacket, put on his aviator shades and lit up his morning cigarette. "We've wasted enough time here."

Mark, already up and clothed, stood ready with his backpack on, his hands holding the backpack straps with his shining grin. “When you’re out and about, never pout!” he gave us a thumbs up.

“It’ll be hard for mumble-mouth not to pout, that’s all he ever did at school!!” Ethan laughed. “That and shit in his pants in the locker room!!!”

“S-S-S-SHUT U-UP ETHAN!” AJ nearly teared up. That made me angry. Ethan and I had mended our relationship to a point after Sarah Fox’s brutal death. I had to convince Ethan to be nicer to AJ since if you’re going to be Glenn Richardson’s friend, you gotta be AJ Miller’s friend too. Two peas in a pod.

"Can it, kids." Donnie said. "We don't have time for your dumbass bickering. Don't fucking test me." “Donnie what should we do now?” Amber asks.

“I know something you can do,” Donnie says, winking. "We need to move. We're sitting ducks here." Donnie responded.

“Sitting ducks? Since when could ducks SIT?” Mark chuckled and poked me with his elbow. I sighed. GOD Mark’s jokes were BAD, but he was my friend, and I would always love him for that.

Donnie pinched his nose in frustration. “Mark, it’s too early in the fucking morning for this.”

“Okay, sorry man...” Mark frowns.

“W-w-wait a s-second, sit-sit-sitting ducks? From w-what, the z-zombies?” AJ asks.

“No, animals.” I said. “Animals that the people have become.”

“Then let’s go.” Sonnie says grabbing Mark’s gun.

Suddenly the sound of a twig snapping from miles away.

“What was that?” Amber asks.

“I don’t know. Who wants to go check?!” Ethan asks.

“N-N-Not me.” AJ mutters.

“Count me out.” I said.

"Not me, bro!!" Mark screamed. For a former police detective, the guy sure was a pussy sometimes, but aren’t we all sometimes?

"Fuck, no!!!" Ethan exploded.

“Ain’t happening buttercup.” Sonnie says with a grim face.

“No thanks.” Amber says standing closer to Mark. What the fuck.

Donnie sighed; “Fine, but I’m not going alone. Glenn, Ethan, you’re up.”

We walked in the woods and found a couple of guys arguing. “I’m warning you, Joe.” One of them said. He sounded kinda British. “Don’t you fuck with me, I’m fucking crazy!”

“Fuck you!” said the other, I think his name is Joe? “Fuck you! Fuck you! Asshole...”

“What the fuck bro!” Ethan whispered. “I’ve heard those voices before!”

Donnie lit up a cigar, “Who the fuck are they?”

“I don’t know!!!” Ethan whispers.

The british guy went quiet for a bit and then we heard the sound of him pulling a sword out of a scabbard. “Oh, now listen here, motherfucker…”

“Let’s get out of here,” I said.

“Yeah lads, let’s skedaddle.” said Donnie. We ran back to camp.

We spent the next couple of hours backtracking to the grocery store. While it burned to the ground, it may still hold treasures untold.

I picked up my pace to match Donnie’s walking pattern. “So, Don.” I ask.

“Don’t call me that. Bert used to call me that.” Donnie replies.

“Sorry, Donnie. What do you think we’ll find in the store? Anything of note?” I ask.

“If I didn’t think there was something of value at the burned down grocery store, then why the fuck would we be going there?” Donnie points out. "That's fucking stupid, kid."

“Alright.” I respond. What an absolute dick, people like that basically lived at my school. I just asked a simple question and was met with hostility. No wonder so many school shootings happened before the apocalypse. People at high schools were such jackasses, not saying I support the decisions made by the mad men but bullying is usually involved in these shootings, it’s not a gun problem it’s a bullying problem. It says a lot about our society.

“When are we gonna get there?” Mark asks.

“Y-y-y-yeah! I’m get-getting t-tired.” AJ musters out of exhaustion.

“Maybe if you didn’t use crutches you wouldn’t be tired!” Ethan points out.

“I-I can’t hel-help it!” AJ points out.

It’s true. AJ couldn’t help it. He had cerebral palsy.

Finally we made it after hours of walking around the streets of my city. It had begun raining so much it was a downpour. We were all soaked and wet, and we smelled like shit. We were truly an unpleasant sight to behold, but I guess everyone was one now in this new world.

The burning remains of the grocery store hurt to see. So many times my parents and I would go there and pick out our dinners. Usually we’d get some lunch meat like ham or roast beef and maybe some frozen pizzas when it got cold. Man it hurt to see it like this, we used to go there all the time to get stuff like pizza bites or orange soda, man mom used to love orange soda. I used to love my mom.

“Well we’re here.” Donnie says.

“This is horrible.” Amber says staring at the remains while I stared at her gorgeous, wetten humps. Damn, she truly was a sight to behold.

“Who ordered a grocery store… extra crispy” Mark says with a thumbs up.

“It truly is a post apocalyptic world.” Sonnie says mourning the loss. "What a loss. What a shame."

"It didn't deserve this..." I said, with tears in my eyes.

“I can’t believe it’s actually gone!!” Ethan sorrowfully says. “Sarah and I used to buy condoms there all the time!” What the fuck, Ethan? I felt the rage boiling deep within, just beneath the skin. I must confess, I felt like a monster. I clenched my fist, but then, I felt Ambers hand on my shoulder.

"Glenn… You have to let it go." Amber Rose said. I wanted to tell her how much I felt at that very moment but I didn’t want to spook her. She must be so scared because of the zombies. I understood why she was scared, for a woman this must be pretty scary. But for a man like myself, I’ve learned to bottle up my emotions like a ticking time bomb.

“W-w-well what are we wait-waiting for.” AJ says. “Things like this are going to happen, we have to get over it at some point, might as well be now.”

“Dammit, AJ’s right.” Sonnie says. “Come on boys, I’m not starving again like I did on the streets. Too many cold nights where I’d try and find places to sleep only to be met with anti homeless spikes. It’s a shame how the U.S treats its veterans and its homeless. However, the UK might be even worse. Knew an old guy down in the Garden City, 82 years old, who had to pull through that shit. It is truly disgusting."

"S-s-s-suits them for c-c-colonizing us, really." AJ muttered.

We approached the hellish remains of the grocery store. I noticed a couple of boxes of twinkies and some bags of chips. But they were all burned and nearly ash. Damn...just another aspect of our previous life gone and we’ll never get back. Just like the superhero movies I used to watch with AJ and his mom. Man, I miss the good old times when we'd just pop in Captain America and have a good time.

Donnie picked up of a 'Buy three, get two for free' sign. “Damn, sales were crazy here. Never noticed it before.”

“Sonnie help me with this.” Mark says holding up a table.

Sonnie ran over to help Mark and lifted the table revealing something horrid, something absolutely dreadful.

“No...no...no...no...no...no...no...no.” Donnie says with tears in his eyes.

“Is that? Oh my god.” Amber cries into her hands.

“Damn. Poor guy.” Sonnie says. "You deserved better, old man."

It was Bert, or what remained.

"Bert didn't deserve this. Sarah didn't deserve it. Nobody does." I said, somberly, as the foul stench of Bert's carbonized corpse filled my nostrils. I felt like I was going to puke, but I couldn't embarrass myself in front of Amber. One of my angels was now gone, I couldn't let the other one slip through my fingers. Speaking of fingers I noticed my fingers were heading for Amber’s sturdy shoulder, I wanted to stop, but I couldn’t now I was going to touch her. Of course that was all in my head, I’d never have the courage to actually do it. Even in my imagination I fucking blew it.

"That son of a bitch deserved it!" Ethan said, pointing to a crawling zombie on the ground. Mr. Chatwin. He was butt naked, except for his red tie and his signature hat.

"Even as a zombie, the hat remains…" Donnie Cruz somberly said, as he lit up a cigarette in honor of Bert, his fallen friend.

Mark moved in to put down Mr. Chatwin, but Ethan stopped him.

"Let this fucking son of a bitch rot!" Ethan spit on Mr. Chatwin's face. "There's barely anything left of him, and he's all burned down and shit! He can't hurt anyone no more!"

"H-H-H-Hey S-S-Sonnie, an-any luck with t-the c-c-candy bars?" AJ stuttered as he made his way towards Sonnie.

"They're all melted to shit." Sonnie sighed. "Not a single one of them is good for consuming."

“A-a-a-a-a-a-a-aw man!” AJ said kicking a can.

“Oh, I’m sorry, baby” Amber said putting her arm around AJ “I’m sure there are more candy bars out there.”

"Yeah, AJ. Don't be such a baby about it." I said, trying to sound cool, but when I looked at Amber, her reaction was that of pure disgust, as she held AJ's hand and pulled him away from me. Fuck.

"Is there anything worth taking in this bitch of a store?" Donnie asked, lighting up a cigarette. "If there isn't, then we backtracked all this way for fucking nothing."

"There's a few canned peaches, and canned pineapples, and canned beans, and canned spaghetti, and some SPAM, and canned tuna." Mark said, grabbing a bunch of cans and sticking them up his backpack.

"I-I-I-Is there any w-w-whipped cream?" AJ's eyes grew wide with excitement.

"No luck, AJ." Mark frowned.

"Sh-sh-shit." AJ.

Now don’t get me wrong, AJ was my best friend and all but sometimes that stutter got on my DAMN nerves I just wanted to deck him, now more than ever. Especially the way Amber was feeling all over him while he stood in blissful ignorance. Why can’t she see me the way she sees him?

"All the money on the register is gone too, fuck me." Sonnie said.

“No thanks.” Mark jokingly said.

"RAAAAAAAAAH!" we heard a voice yell

Suddenly, before anyone knew what was happening, a crazed, reeking man with a long beard jumped out from behind a door and lunged at Sonnie. He was wearing a dirty jumper with the name "Grendel" written on it.

Luckily, Sonnie reacted fast and punched Grendel right in the nose, breaking it and forcing the man to the ground, crying. He then pointed Mark's gun at the man's head and pulled the trigger, splattering his brains all over the burned floor of the grocery store. Or at least we thought he did. Sonnie didn't get a clean shot, he only managed to shoot off the man's ear. Grendel then tackled Sonnie, making him hit his head on the counter and pass out.

Amber slammed Grendel with a frying pan. “Back off, freak!”

Grendel grinned. “Is that how your mother told you to talk to big daddy Gren?”

"Amber, no!" I yelled, as I started to run towards them.

"Stay the fuck away from her!" Donnie Cruz shouted, as he jumped and landed a kick on Grendel's back, knocking him to the floor. He then grabbed the man by his beard and burned his forehead with the cigarette he had lit a few seconds prior.

"AAAAAAAAAHHHHH!" Grendel yelled, in pain.

I froze up. I don't know what happened, but I literally couldn't move. I was awestruck with Donnie Cruz's act of bravery, and I couldn't even help Amber to get away from the two. Grendel elbowed Donnie Cruz in the stomach and quickly turned around to kick him in the scrotum, and meanwhile, I just watched as Mark grabbed her hand and yanked her away from Donnie and Grendel, who were now wrestling on the floor.

"Mark, help me!" Donnie yelled, as Grendel tried to dug his long disgusting fingernails into his left eye, only for him to anticipate it and move out of the way at the last possible second, earning a deep scar in his cheek for it. Not gonna lie, Donnie with a scar looked kind of cool.

"Get out of the way!" Mark yelled. "I can't get a clear shot!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Grendel screamed in angry. I’ve never seen a man, no a beast, this angry before in my 17 years of life. 11 of those years I spent being bullied.

BLAM!

Before we knew it, a shot rang out, and Grendel fell dead on top of Donnie Cruz, his brains and gore oozing off like slime and getting all over his face. I looked over at Mark, expecting to see him triumphant, but he had no gun in his hand. I scanned the room, trying to find whoever killed the assailant, and then I saw it. It was Ethan.

"Don't fuck with my friends!!!!" Ethan said, pointing Mark's gun at Grendel.

“F-f-friends?” AJ asks hopefully.

“Don’t push your luck, jitterbug.” Ethan says, but with a bit of comedic timing implying he was doing it jokingly. Maybe I didn’t need to ask Ethan to take it easy on AJ, maybe they would be friends. I guess time will tell.

“Thanks Ethan, that was crazy.” Donnie said pulling out a cigarette. “That was intense.”

“No problem man. Y’know, you’re starting to grow on me.” Ethan says handing the gun to Donnie.

“Yo where’s Sarah?!” Ethan asks.

“What do you mean?” I ask, confused as she had died just a week ago.

“She’s dead.” Sonnie says.

“I know that stankfoot.” Ethan says, “But if we found Mr. Chatwin and Bert then we should’ve found her dead body by now.”

“Holy moly you’re right.” Mark said. “Maybe she’s still alive?”

“Really Mark?” I asked, knowing full well that I was speaking for everyone. His jokes becoming annoying by this point.

“It wasn’t a joke, I was just being optimistic.” Mark said.

"Maybe she turned and left." Sonnie said, somberly.

“I’m going to go find her.” Ethan says storming off towards the electronics isle. I could see his reflection in the cameras on the shelf, I could even see us, we looked terrible. I mean absolutely dreadful. I looked like I hadn’t showered in weeks. Not that it was an issue, I still had some deodorant and honestly before the apocalypse I occasionally didn’t shower and just used deodorant, it’s basically like taking a shower without the water. I wish people would understand but at school everyone would say I smelled. Yeah I smelled, smelled of success.

"Ethan, wait the fuck up!" I yelled, running after him. "Guys, I'll get him back, don't worry!"

"You damn better do that, kid." Donnie said, throwing away a burnt out cigarette. "You wouldn't want him to die like his girlfriend, would you?"

“Good point Donnie.” I respond, without stop running, I didn’t want Ethan to die.

Ethan stopped running after a while, good thing too since I was getting tired.

“Ethan, we gotta go back to the group. We don’t know what’s gonna happen out here. It’s a zombie apocalypse for God's sake. They’re everywhere.” I said. “We’re basically sitting ducks out here.”

“I’m sorry Glenn!” Ethan says. “I’m sorry Sarah, for not saving you. I should’ve been there. God dammit.” Ethan says punching a tree.

“It’s okay Ethan, I’m here. Your friends and I want you to return to the group. We know you didn’t want Sarah to die.” I say. He was so emotionally complex, it hurt my head trying to wrap my feelings around Ethan.

“I can’t go back!” Ethan says. “Not until I find her body. Her gorgeous delicate body. I used to wrap my hands around her body with her slender athletic body!!”

“I know Ethan, she was beautiful.” I says

Ethan smiled, “Y’know, she liked you.”

My heart flutters, “What!?”

“She liked you before the apocalypse. She would sometimes tell Jason and I how great you seemed and how she wanted to invite you to the jock table. She said she liked your dimples and your cute smirk. She said your pimples made you look adorkable, like a baby.” Ethan explained. “But Jason wouldn’t allow it.”

That fucking scumbag! He kept me from her! Her beautiful toned body couldn’t been next to mine in my bed. Jason may have admitted to being terrible, but this was unforgivable.

“You’re fucking serious?” Glenn said, the rage was boiling inside him like water in a pot for macaroni and cheese, all this time Sarah loved him "I'm glad I fucking killed him, then."

"Ok, Glenn wait a damn second.”

“NO!” Glenn interrupted. “I’ve been cut off by bullies like you my entire life…. My ENTIRE life, Ethan. Well now its my turn to talk, it’s a new world, a new society, bullies like you no longer hold the cards!”

Before Glenn realized what he was doing he tackled Ethan to the ground and began pounding his face with his fists. It was his turn to be the bully.

“What the fuck, bro!?” Ethan screamed. “Get the fuck off me, bro! Watch the jacket, bro!”

"RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" I roared with extreme anger. Before I could throw another punch a bright spotlight shined in my face three figures stood over them.

“Well what do we got here,” A British man said as he stepped out of the light “We got a couple of yokels ‘ere making out!”

“HAHAHAHAHAHA” a man carrying at least twelve guns on his person jeered “Good one, bro!” He and the British bloke clapped up.

"Y'all fucked now, bwo!" said a third, skinny man with a mustache and speech impediment.

Glenn glared at the men. “Who the fuck are you assholes?”

The Man with the guns pointed a gun at Glenn “My name is Brent and we’re the Claimers.” He cocked the gun “You two are claimed.”

Deaths

 * Grendel

Trivia

 * This is the mid season premiere.
 * This episode takes place a week after the last making this the first time a timeskip is used in AWB.
 * This is the first appearance of a group from the main show, this being "The Claimers".
 * While not published on Memorial Day this episode was written on it making this a Memorial Day special.
 * This episode is the first to not have Jennifer Lawrence (Sarah Fox)'s in the opening titles, this is due to the character's death in the last episode.